Parenting questions

 Officer Gomez conversation starters!

Use this list as a starting point. Add, edit, and share as needed—it just might help another parent out. Some of these should be started in Kindergarten…..

Let’s talk about…

SEX

☐ What sex actually is

☐ Respect for partners

☐ Porn vs. real relationships

☐ STDs and how they spread

☐ Consent and consequences

☐ Pregnancy and the cost of raising a child

☐ Contraception options

RESPECT

☐ At home

☐ At school

☐ In public

DRUGS

☐ Short- and long-term consequences

☐ Addiction and its impact on families

☐ Lost opportunities

☐ How drug use affects future jobs

☐ The real cost of drug use

VAPING

☐ Long-term health effects

☐ Nicotine addiction

☐ How much it actually costs

☐ It’s not a “just for now” decision

ALCOHOL

☐ Underage drinking

☐ Parties and peer pressure

☐ Options if they end up drunk (yes, parents will come pick them up)

☐ Friends driving drunk

☐ Legal consequences

MINORS + NUDE PHOTOS

☐ Criminal charges possible to minor

☐ Once it’s sent, it’s permanent

☐ Online sextortion is real and getting help

☐ It can affect school and future jobs

SCHOOL

☐ Why school matters in your family

☐ Homework mindset

☐ What else school teaches besides academics

☐ Behavior and student expectations

COLLEGE & BEYOND

☐ Start exploring options around 8th grade

☐ Pros and cons of college

☐ Budgeting for college vs. income potential

☐ Trade schools, military, and apprenticeships

DRIVING

☐ What the family expects when they drive

☐ Who can be in the car

☐ Texting and driving

☐ What to do when the car breaks down

☐ Talk through their first crash scenario—step by step

DATING

☐ What age/behavior is appropriate

☐ Setting and respecting boundaries

☐ How to leave a relationship safely

☐ Signs of a controlling or toxic partner

SOCIAL CONFLICT & BULLYING

☐ Social conflict vs. bullying

☐ What to do in each situation

☐ How to manage anger and solve problems

☐ How to support friends being bullied

FINANCES

☐ Budgeting basics

☐ Credit cards and debt

☐ Saving, investing, and taxes

☐ Setting financial goals

☐ Buying a car or a home

SUICIDE & SELF-HARM

☐ How to ask for help

☐ Who their trusted adults are

☐ What to do if a friend is suicidal or cutting

Parenting Tip:

Have these conversations often and repeat them as many times as necessary.

Happy Parenting,

– Officer Gomez

Parenting tips

 One of the most effective parenting tools we use in our home is something we call “Tribal Council.”

Over the years, our circle has included our own kids, their friends, foster kids, foreign exchange students, and just about any teenager who happens to be at our house that night. If you’re in the home, you’re on the team. We try to hold Tribal Council once a week.

The purpose is simple: to reinforce that we are a team and a family, regardless of blood connection. We want the kids to know we are watching out for them, just as we expect them to watch out for us.

We sit in a circle and everyone answers the first question:

How was your week?

From there, we move into questions like:

• What did you accomplish this week?

• What are you looking forward to next week?

• Is there an area where you’re struggling?

(This is where grades, bullying, or other concerns can come up naturally.)

• What can you do next week to improve?

• Any new friends or relationships?

• Anything exciting happening?

After check-ins, we usually cover one life lesson. These are discussions, not lectures.

Some example lessons:

• How to introduce yourself properly

Handshake, eye contact, repeating the person’s name, confident posture.

• How to get a job

Dress well. Give a firm handshake. Make eye contact. Ask thoughtful questions about the company. Clearly say you want the job. Follow up afterward.

• Dating and relationships

What are you worth?

What are you looking for in a friend or partner?

Recognizing healthy and unhealthy behaviors.

Setting boundaries.

How to exit a relationship respectfully.

• Handling drama

Why do people start drama?

Should you participate or move on?

What does being offended actually mean?

Who controls your emotions?

How should you respond to insults?

There are countless topics you can cover. The key is creating a safe environment where everyone speaks and everyone listens. When it feels like a discussion instead of a preaching session, communication opens up and relationships grow stronger.